I've always wondered why the hardest things happen to the strongest people. I've often thought things like, "Why should they have to go through that? They have already learned that lesson or experienced that." I guess I've always thought that trials are only for the people going through them to learn from. But over the last three weeks, I've gained an entirely new understanding.
God doesn't always use trials to change the direct recipients. Rather, He may use the strongest people to teach and be bright beacons and examples to those of us who don't quite understand or always remember the important things. God knows what we can bear, and will never give us more than we can handle. He may push us to the edge, or out of our comfort zone, but He is always there holding our hand, ready to pull us back in as soon as He knows we are ready- whether that be before we think we are going to fall, or when we finally understand what he is trying to teach us.
My brother, Jeff, and his wife, Rachel, have been the bright beacons and examples to me during this time of trial for our family. Jeff and Rachel were expecting a baby girl on November 3, but instead, she was born on July 15, at 24 weeks along. Her name is Lacey Elaine, and she weighed 1 lb. 2 oz. She is 10.5 in. long, and is the most beautiful and perfect angel you could ever meet.
Lacey was stable for two days before they found a bleed in her brain. A few days later, they began to see signs of other complications and illnesses, and on Sunday, July 28, 2013, Lacey Elaine returned to live with her Heavenly Father.
I have learned so much more from Lacey in the two weeks that I knew her here in mortality than I have learned in a very long time. Lacey reminded me how important Eternal Marriage is, and living righteously so that you can receive the blessings that come from Temple Marriage.
Lacey reminded me that mortality is such a small part of our lives. Mortality is just a bump in road between being created by our loving Father in Heaven, and becoming loving fathers and mothers of our own kingdoms and spirit children. Lacey also showed me how pure and true the love of Christ is.
As I sat and held Lacey in the hospital, I was reminded just how thin the veil is that separates us from our loved ones who have passed on, and from all of that eternal knowledge and understanding that is temporarily withheld from us in this mortal state. I held Lacey close in my arms, and told her how much I love her. I kissed her forehead and promised her that I will do all that I possibly can to come join her in the highest kingdom of Heaven. I know that she is up teaching the gospel and comforting all of her family that are still here on earth, still trying our best to understand and become as spiritually perfect and prepared as she is.
I will love Lacey forever, and will always miss having her with my family here on earth, but I know that no matter what, she its still getting the better end of the deal, and that's what I want for her- to not be hurting or sick or weary. I love you Lacey Elaine. Thank you for your constant example and living proof of the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ. It is one of joy and strength. How grateful I am to know that my God is a god of mercy and of love, of infinite goodness and of comfort.
